The Womb of the Earth
A reflection on darkness, rebirth, and transformation.
To be buried alive
is not for the faint of heart.
To dig a grave for oneself
sounds gruesome,
macabre,
depressing to most.
Yet if truth be spoken,
it is quite the opposite.
For you truly know you are alive
when you lie as though already dead.
Beneath the stillness of a dark moon,
inside a chamber carved a few feet beneath the earth,
I listen.
Above me,
the hooves , paws and claws of unseen creatures
move across the land.
Foxes forage.
Owls call into the night.
Shrieks echo through distant trees.
Yet below,
the world is different.
The soil is thick with damp clay,
wet and fertile,
breathing the scent of ancient earth.
Beside my ear,
something moves softly.
I have never heard the sound before,
yet somehow I know it intimately
the slow body of an earthworm
pressing through the dark heavy space.
Rough and smooth all at once.
I marvel at how such a thing is possible.
Then uncertainty arrives.
Perhaps it is an ant.
My breath stops, No…
a beetle.
It is strange how darkness
makes everything visible.
Sight disappears,
yet every other sense awakens.
The grave surrounding me begins to shift.
Loose earth crumbles against my skin,
yet fear does not rise within me.
My senses tell me
it is only a mole ,
drilling and clawing through the soil,
changing course as though it senses
another creature within its burrow.
And so I wait,
as the earth itself seems to move around me,
knowing my life is about to unravel.
To dismember.
To dissolve.
I surrender myself to death.
Then suddenly ….cold.
Not the cold of the earth,
for I lie within the womb
of the Great Mother herself.
No.
This cold comes from somewhere deeper.
Within me .
I am furious.
I am disconnecting.
I scream into the darkness.
Perhaps I do not die today after all.
For though I long to die
and be reborn,
some hidden part of me
still refuses to let go.
How attached I must still be
to this pain.
I place my hand
against the wall of my mother’s womb
and beg her …..
please.
And then,
everything turns black.
Jeni @ Peace Of Mind Health 🤍🙏
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